A Parenting frustration – poo, wee, fart, burp…

Yes, that’s the title of this blog post and it will all make sense when you read further, I promise, I haven’t lost the plot and taken to talking like a pre school child with potty mouth…

However, that is what this post is about.

Small Boy is going through that delightful stage where he finds it hysterical to drop certain words into conversations or just randomly. Poo, wee, fart, willy, bottom are all firm favourites and he also has mastered the art of fake burping like a man who has had 10 pints of beer and a large curry and needs to burp it all out (he has NOT, I assure you learned that from me or LSH) and he uses this skill whenever, and where ever he can, at home, at meals, in public and of course thinks its hilarious to drop burp bombs at any given moment, (interestingly, not at nursery or at his lovely child-minder’s house, though)

Yesterday he let rip like what I can only describe as a gigantic toad like burp, in Starbucks, and whilst the people next to me laughed, the old lady at the other table looked most disapproving and told him off, which only made him do it more. Cue us finishing drinks and me slinking out, burping child in tow, slightly embarrassed.

It’s driving me mad. It’s not funny any more, and I know he does it because it gets a reaction, so we have of course tried to stop reacting, but actually, the burping is not attractive, and when he has produced 3 0r 4 of these burps while we are trying to eat, then gets silly, starts laughing and messing around, and stops eating, or distracts his sister,  it’s not very pleasant for meal times. We have started making him get down from the table, if he continues, but that seems to have little or no effect.

The potty mouth talk, is also frustrating and a bit boring frankly. When I ask him what he wants with his pasta and get “poo” or whatever, and then he and his sister pack up laughing and starting getting silly, I do wonder if working in a nice quiet office, where there is no toilet talk, would be a better option.

I know it’s a phase, and it will pass, but WHEN?? How do you deal with this stage, what do you do? Just ignore, don’t react? Adopt the “can’t beat them, join them mantra” and make a game out of it? Do you intervene and enforce some sort of discipline when it gets beyond a certain limit?

Send SuperNanny now? I would love to hear some thoughts on this, feel free to chime in, but I don’t want to hear “poo, fart, wee, willy” or a gigantic burp…. 😉

Also, if you would like to contribute as a guest poster, on a parenting post, please let me know. You can mail me karen@themadhouseofcatsandbabies.com

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Posted in Family Life and Parenting.


  1. Hehe this made me chuckle but Im not at that stage yet and I can imagine its really frustrating if its in public. I hope it’s a quick phase (although that loud and long burping does sound impressive) x

  2. This has made me chuckle BIG time but I can appreciate that when in public it’s not always appropriate and that at meal times it’s clearly a distraction. Lucas has done all of this. and I am definitely no expert but I stopped the treats at a coffee shop/café when we went into town. These were his highlights and when he asked why we weren’t going, I told him that he couldn’t behave, therefore, didn’t deserve the treat. Likewise for mealtimes. I actually took his dinner away from him when he went ‘overboard’ at dinner. With regards to his ‘poo’ remarks when asking him about food, try serving an empty plate and when they ask, tell them that they can’t eat ‘poo’, ‘willies’, etc… so they can’t have anything until they answer properly. I love toilet humour but despite what I may write about I do believe there is a time and a place. The accidental ‘slip’ is hilarious but I totally see where you’re coming from. I got told I was too strict but I hope these help. Good luck x #pocolo

  3. Mine did not go through this stage exactly, so I don’t have exact help… I can tell you that for my kids it’s not just the reaction that makes them do these kind of things, it’s the actual fact that it’s annoying or embarrassing for us that heighten their behaviour. If they know it upsets us they’ll do it more. I will say just try not to react in an angry or embarrassed way, just very “businesslike” – at Starbucks just tell him to apologise loudly, and get out with your head held high. At home – one warning and then to the naughty corner or losing privileges. It is just a stage, good luck!

  4. Grace definitely went through a similar phase and I have to say that we used to call either other things like poo poo head, wee wee brain and fart pants. We used to laugh – and some people laughed a long. She grew out of it. Never really laughed at the farting and burping bit though – just made sure she said pardon and was polite about it! Thank you for linking to PoCoLo x

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