Friday’s Rant From the Soap Box In MY Living Room!


Welcome to my Friday’s Rants from the Soap Box in my Living Room. A small space in the week where I can have a chunter about things that have made me twitch with annoyance or made me question if the world has gone mad or not….
I also  linked up with MummyBarrow for her Ranty Friday. You can find her blog and link up here if you’d like to join in. A good rant can be therapeutic.

Dear Little Birdies in the tree and on the wires, outside my house…

birds-on-a-wireFor some reason, your biological clock has made you decide that chirping and tweeting your little heads off, merrily, and very loudly from 3:30am each morning is the thing to do. It is not light, at all, and the cold, wet weather does not seem to deter you from your choral parade in the wee small hours.

I have no idea why you do this, but I do know that it convinces my 3.5 year old, when he wakes at that time, that it is “morning time, the birdies are awake” and I have to use tremendous powers of persuasion (because no, 3:30am is NOT morning, in my house, and never will be) to get him back to bed, and tell him that your alarm clocks must not be working, or similar trite things.

Also, you wake up my cats, who then take it upon themselves to try and get onto the window sill, to watch you and yowl yearningly at you, all lined up in the branches of the tree, because all they want to do is get out and get you (or at least have a jolly good try) This also disturbs the household, and if you read my blog, which of course you haven’t, being birds, you would know that sleep and trying to get any, is a bit of a sore point and hot topic round these parts, and I get extremely grumpy and resentful of beings, human, feline or otherwise who disturb what precious little sleep I do get.

I’d appreciate it if you would take  your cute little fluffy beaked selves off somewhere else. There is a whole copse, filled with trees, suitable for you, just down the road, perfect for your pre pre dawn chorus and no one to disturb but the badgers (whom I also loathe, so feel free to wake them up extra early)

From: grumpy, tired, and considering buying an air rifle to take a few pot shots and make sparrow and thrush pie with the results, in Ham!

(of course I am only joking about buying the gun, I am a crap shot, anyway 😉 )


Posted in Friday's Rants from The Soap Box.


  1. Lol, this is clearly where 4 and 20 blackbirds baked in a pie came from. 24 noisy blackbirds p***ing off the queen!

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