Friday’s Rants from the Soap Box in MY Living Room

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Welcome to my Friday’s Rants from the Soap Box in my Living Room. A small space in the week where I can have a chunter about things that have made me twitch with annoyance or made me question if the world has gone mad or not….
I also  linked up with MummyBarrow for her Ranty Friday. You can find her blog and link up here if you’d like to join in. A good rant can be therapeutic.

My Ranty Friday this week is about manners, or lack of them:

I am fairly strict with my children, about manners. “Please”, “thank you”, “excuse me”, you know, the basic stuff, that somehow, society seems to be forgetting how to use.

Maybe I am wrong, maybe it’s just been a bad couple of weeks, maybe my chronic lack of sleep and tiredness is making me so grumpy, that I am being super sensitive, and noticing lack of manners and general politeness, more than usual, but it seems to me, that people really are not as polite as they used to be, and consideration for others and common courtesy is dying out?

Why is it ok to not say excuse me, when you are trying to get past someone, or need to reach over them in the supermarket to get something on a shelf? Why is ok to not say thank you to the person who served you in the coffee shop, and just to walk away? Why is it ok to not say please when you ask for something?

This week I have seen so much rudeness, and just plain bad manners.

I actually stood next to a woman, in the supermarket, who watched the cashier put all her shopping in a bag, then paid her, then walked away, without even saying thank you. English was not her problem, she had been on the phone, talking, before her turn in the queue, so the language barrier excuse doesn’t cut it. The woman serving her, had been pleasant, polite and fast, I don’t think a “thank-you” was amiss. I am pretty sure, working behind a ’til in Tesco’s all day is not the paradise job to end all jobs, and when people are rude and don’t use basic manners, it can’t be much fun, and I think even somewhat demoralising?

I saw a man shove his way past a line of people, without even saying “excuse me, please”, to get to the service counter he needed, because clearly, he was FAR more important than anyone else, and being polite was beneath him. I don’t care if you are in a hurry, an “excuse me” does not hold you up, or cost you anything.

I made my own 6-year-old give up a seat, for a an older woman, on the bus this week, because she is perfectly capable of standing, for a couple of stops, and the woman didn’t even grace us with a thank-you, just sniffed at us and sat down, again, the language barrier wasn’t a problem, and a thank you would have been appreciated. I don’t expect a fanfare for basic politeness myself, giving up your seat for someone who needs it is something you SHOULD do, but it wouldn’t hurt to get a thank-you.

A man helped a woman down some stairs at the station last weekend, while her partner was too busy on his phone to help her, she was profusely grateful, but the man may as well have been on another planet. Maybe his call was of the utmost importance, but it just seemed downright rude, to me, to not even say a simple thank-you, to the man who helped your partner down some steps, while you were busy?

These are just some of the examples, and whilst they aren’t shocking, they are sad. People don’t queue politely any more, we don’t offer up seats on public transport, we don’t spend a second showing common courtesy to others.

I don’t know how we rectify this? Do we just accept that manners don’t matter, and get on with it, and stop making the effort. I won’t be doing that, and as long as my children are under my roof, please, thank-you and other basic etiquette will be enforced. It doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t cost anything, and actually it can make someone’s day better.

What do you think? Are manners dying out? Have you noticed a lack of manners and common courtesy? Am I just being grumpy and nit-picky? Are children not being taught manners at school anymore, and parents aren’t teaching them at home?

Feel free to join in the linky, by clicking on the badge below, to add your rant to the Ranty Friday Link

MummyBarrow

Have a good weekend!

Posted in Friday's Rants from The Soap Box and tagged etiquette, manners, politness.

12 Comments

  1. Totally with you! Lack of manners driving me nuts. Like you I have always taught my children manners, and expect a high standard of behaviour from them, sadly few other people seem to do the same.Courtesy costs nothing and makes the world a nicer place for everyone – why don’t other people see that ?

    • I am not sure what they teach in schools in terms of manners, and stuff. I must ask the teachers next time at a Parent night! 🙂

  2. I think it is seen as old-fashioned to be bothered about common courtesy these days. However, I am totally with you. As you say, it costs nothing and oils the wheels of society and makes people feel like they exist at least.

    • It’s just sad, isn’t it? I taught my kids baby sign, and one of their first signs were “thank you” and the other was “please”. Sometimes I am tempted to offer lessons to the rude adults in the world!

  3. I am with you! Good manners cost nothing, they should be used at all time and they make you feel good! If someone smiles and says ‘thank you’ it just cheers me up a little bit. My kids have always been taught to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ and I find myself saying it for other people’s kids if they don’t say it when I give them something!

    • I do that too. Most of Em’s friends are pretty polite, but there are one or two who need a gentle reminder to say please and thank-you!

  4. I am forever drumming manners into our kids – if I hand L something I won’t let go until she says thank you. I have to say I don’t notice it much when out and about, but that’s probably because I’m still comparing it to the French Riviera where you get absolutely zero manners. So far the UK is still doing far better. Maybe if all of us parents agree to keep teaching manners the country won’t go to the dogs?

  5. I’m obsessive about THESE sort of manners. Pet hate…” excuse me” used as a sort of demand. It’s a gracious ” excuse me please” or nothing. And entitled old people…don’t get me started…so obnoxious.

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